Tuesday, December 16, 2014

MOPS Moments: Raising Brave and Confident Kids

Sometimes, you just need people in your life who speak the truth. It may not be new information, but oftentimes, I need reminders. Yesterday, at MOPS, I heard some of those truths that it is easy to forget.

I get caught up in the laundry, dishes, meals, diapers, lack of sleep...and I forget about the privilege I have been given to be the mom of two awesome kids. I could tell that the other moms in the room yesterday felt the same way. We all seemed to hang on to every work spoken. I was scribbling down notes as fast as I could.

When I got home yesterday, I had a text from a friend. She lives several states away. She's a mom of a little one. And she was feeling those overwhelming thoughts herself. Does my life mean anything anymore? Why does it feel like I am drowning in diapers and dirty clothes? Will I ever get a break? Am I the only one who can't seem to do it all?

And so, I sent her a copy of my scribblings from yesterday's meeting.

Our speaker, Bekita, who is the Women's Ministry Director at our church, shared great truth with me...and I hope that the truths she shared might resonate with and minister to other moms out there.

(And my notes are not super organized...like I said, I was just writing in any space on my paper that I could find)

3 John 1:4
"I could have no greater joy than to hear that my children are following the truth."

Psalm 127:4-5
"Children...are like arrows in a warrior's hands. 
How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them..."

A warrior would want sharp arrows when he goes out for a hunt. He would spend time preparing the tips, making sure that they were sharp enough to stick into the target (game) when shot. A dull arrow would make a failure of a hunter. 

I am sharpening my arrows (kids) now, while they are young in hopes that they will hit their intended target someday. What am I aiming for? If I don't have a target, I can't expect to hit it. 

Don't be devastated when your kid moves on to the next stage (big boy bed, going to kindergarten, etc.) It just means you are doing your job as their mom, moving them on to the next season in life. 

The Home Front
Describe your home right now?
  1. A home is a treasure to be used, not a trophy to be displayed.
    The enemy tells us we need to have a big expensive house in order to host. He (Satan) wants to keep us isolated. BUT have people over!! People are more important than the appearance of your house. 
  2. Your home is to be a haven.
    It's up to me, the mom, to create that safe haven.
  3. You, the mom, set the tone of the home.
    Conversation, music, what's on TV, etc. 
  4. Let them see me as a "Praying Mom"
    Pray at breakfast/on the way to school
    Pray at lunch
    Pray at Bedtime
    Let my kids hear me pray "God, thank you for picking me to be ________'s mom."
  5. What kind of heritage do you want your children to have?
    Long term goal
    You are creating their heritage right now. 
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
"And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today.
Repeat them again and again to your children. 
Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are 
going to bed and when you are getting up."

You can't teach something you don't know yourself. Be in the Word!

Deuteronomy 11:18-19
"Therefore, be careful to obey every command I am giving you today,
so you may have strength to go in and take over the land you are about to enter. 
If you obey, you will enjoy a long life..."

Modeling vs. Monitoring
I want to be a mom my kids want to be like. I want to be busy knowing God. I want to show them how to live rather than just tell them what they should do. I want them to see me praying, in the Word, not complaining, working hard, etc. 

Ephesians 6:10-18 - Whatever God puts together, Satan is working to pull apart. Fighting kids. Broken marriages, etc. 

The Early Years (0-4 years)
  1. Begin praying for their spouses.
  2. Learn to mean what you say.
    Gives them confidence.
    Establishes better authority.
    Teaches them to obey.
    They learn they can trust what I say. They learn they can count on me.
    Before I give an answer, I need to take a minute to think it through - so that I don't have to go back on what I say.
  3. Disciple = love and correction
    Hebrews 12:6
    Remember discipline means correcting a bad behavior. May require punishment. 
  4. When they are little, use the spanking spoon
    Different than your hand
    A punishment they can remember
    For willful disobedience not childish ignorance
  5. Unacceptable behavior is what you are working to correct.
    It's a life lesson.
    Teaching them self-control
  6. When you need a break...take one!
    Hard because moms are "always on" even when sleeping. Always listening.
    Suggested driving around the block when your husband gets home from work, taking a walk, getting up earlier, etc. 
Surround yourself with Scripture in your home. Post it, frame it, write it on chalkboards, say it, sing it, etc. 

Ephesians 2:10
"For (your name) is God's Masterpiece. 
He has created me new in Christ Jesus so that I can do 
the good things He planned for me long ago."

She suggested the following books:

Dare to Discipline by James Dobson

Growing Wise in Family Life by Chuck Swindoll

PS: Hannah gets credit for the "MOPS Moments" title :)

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